What Is Love?

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so for those of you who look at the bulletin ahead of time or even can see it on the screen now you see the title and so I need prayer I need prayer for two things obviously one that God would speak right now uh during this time but also if anybody was around when I was in high school back in 1993 there was a song released by this title by this man named hadway I don’t know if he’s ever done music since then I don’t know anything about him but this song it is simultaneously one of the most annoying but one of the catchiest songs so it’s been in my head for the last few weeks and it’s playing right now and so I just need you to pray with me that while I’m preaching the word of God I don’t have what is love baby don’t hurt me don’t hurt me no more in my head is going on but with everything that we heard even this morning from the word of God uh from 1 John 4 and everything that we see in general in the word of God and everything that we hear from the time that we’re born about love and how we should love each other and love would do this or not do that there was a song back in the day love would have brought you home home last night you know just just everything is love love love is the motivation for doing something or love is something that’s missing from my life or everyone whether you are a Believer or not love is this topic it’s it’s a topic that dominates many people money and love and with money it’s usually the Love of Money it it’s so so love we we come especially when we are told that God is love then the question would be What is love without the rest of the the the song What Is Love and that’s what we are coming to find out and fortunately God did not leave us to figure this out on our own he did not leave us to our experiences he did not leave us to just the teachings of our parents or the society to tell us what love is but he tells us in his word and he demonstrates it as well so let’s go to the Lord in prayer and then we’ll look to see how he answers this question our gracious God and Father we want to thank you for being the demonstration of love that while we were sinners Christ died for us the ungodly that you showed your love to us when we were undesirable and unlovable and Lord as the objects of your love you command us to love others and not just command us but you Empower us to do so and so I pray God that as we look in your word to see what you have to say about love that you would convict us you would encourage us and you will strengthen us God because we can’t carry these things out without your enablement and your empowerment so we ask that you’ll be with us right now in Christ’s name amen so in 1 John 4: um 7 and 8 and this is part of the text that was read earlier uh this is what John says he says beloved let us love one another for love is from God and everyone who loves is Bor of God and knows God but then verse eight he says the one who does not love does not know God for God is love so it’s extremely important that we figure out what love is if our relationship with God is proven or disproven by our willingness our desire and our ability to show love then we better become experts on what love truly is and what It Isn’t So in our text today Paul gives the Corinthians and us a definition of Love Now many are familiar with the church at Corinth um they they had problems they had issues one of the things I think is fascinating as you read through the book when you first open the letter Paul affirms that they’re a believing church that some or most of them are anyway he says you are Saints by calling he calls them brothers he encourages them and how God is using them and even talks about the spiritual gifts that are prominent in the church so he’s talking to a group of Believers and obviously Jesus even tells us that the wheat and the teras are going to grow together so in every assembly of Believers you’re going to have unbelievers there but is talking to Believers he’s not talking to an apostate Church where no one there knows God so in verses in chapter 1 verse 10 and 11 in 1 Corinthians Paul says now I exhort you Brethren by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ that you all agree and that there be no divisions among you but that you be made complete in the same mind and in the same judgment for I have been informed concerning you my brethren by Khloe’s people that there are quarrels among you so this church for all of its its giftings could not operate in love there was disunity throughout the church even in something simple as what teacher they follow or who they heard the gospel from initially and in chapters one right after what we I just read and also in chapter 3 Paul addresses that and he thumbs say I’m I follow Barnabas I follow Paul I follow sephus and the really deep one said well I’m of Christ I don’t I don’t deal any of them teachers I’m I’m just deep I only follow Christ and they were arguing about it and it was a source of Pride for them what teacher influenced them what person baptized them and Paul said I’m glad I didn’t baptize any of you except these couple people because then you would say you were baptized in the name of Paul rather than in the Name of Christ in chapter five he talks about their willingness to tolerate sin a sin that was so wicked that he said it’s not even named among the Gentiles unbelievers don’t even do this and you’re doing getting proud of it and it was even causing disunity because they couldn’t agree on how to deal with it or should they deal with it at all and in verse chapter 6 excuse me he says can you stop suing each other please please your brothers and sisters in Christ can you stop taking each other to court and there he said why not just be defrauded for the sake of unity be willing to accept mistreatment and we’ll see actually that’s one of the things that love does then in chapter 7 there were some who were married and seemingly holding marriage up as something that was higher than the state singleness and causing people to feel and if it’s anything like the church today probably was causing women especially to feel as though you’re not complete until you become a wife and a mother which is a Lie by the way and Paul addresses that in in chapter 7 but again another source of disunity and then even to the people who are married he say stop defrauding each other and there he’s talking about physical intimacy stop holding out on each other because that’s how Satan will come into your marriage unless you agree for a time as husband and wife that you will abstain other than that stop defrauding each other they couldn’t even have unity in their own marriages then even handled handling matters of conscience in the next few chapters and he brings up the example of meat sacrifice to idols and how they should handle that and and whether that’s something where there’s a blanket rule for every believer or is not one of these what we would call today kind of gray areas and how do you handle that how do you had handle matters of conscience and they could not agree even on that and then their disunity got so bad that they were dishonoring the Lord’s table and those who were wealthy were mistreating those who didn’t have wealth and he said they were dishonoring the Lord’s table to the point where God took some of them out some were dead and others were sick because of the way they mistreated each other and the way that they misjudged themselves and and didn’t take the Lord’s table seriously and then to our text today in chapters 12 13 and 14 he’s talking to them about spiritual gifts and how their view of spiritual gifts cause major disunity and splintering in the church where they took a a set of gifts and said these are the gifts that are are the wonderful gifts that everybody should go after these are the gifts that are really important and these gifts down here yeah they’re not really they’re not really that important I guess someone has to do those things someone has to have these gifts but these are the gifts over here and and so first about spiritual gifts we just need to understand and you’ll learn more in the in the if you are a new member and take our new members class and we talk about gifts but the Bible doesn’t present spiritual gifts as like an onoff switch where someone has a gift of teaching and then you have zero ability to teach zero spiritual enablement to teach that’s not how they’re they’re presented there are some who are going to have a higher level there are some who may have very little of another gift but it seems to be this kind of spectrum where there’s just a if you were to look at the soundboard now and you would see some of the levels are they’re all at different levels but the sound is very cohesive and functioning properly and that’s how we are and man maybe Paul should have used a soundboard instead of a body I don’t know that was that was that was good but but but that’s but that’s how he presents it but instead they were like no no no these five right here this is what we’re paying attention to and if if I have these gifts and if they’re if these gifts are expressed very very very highly in me then I can look down on the others who don’t have these gifts to the same degree and then those who didn’t have those gifts and had other gifts were saying I can’t I’m useless to the body I can’t serve it all I’m just a I’m just a pinky toe I can’t serve until you break your pinky toe and you realize you can’t even walk without it so he says you have disunity even in using the spiritual gifts and so in in Chapter 13 we get this section here because he’s showing them that love is greater than any spiritual gift and if we look at chapter 13 the first three verses he even uh uses hyperbole to to get this point across it says 1 Corinthians 13: 1-3 it says if I speak with the tongues of men and angels but do not have love I have become a noisy gong or a clinging symbol if I have the gift of Prophecy and know all Mysteries and all knowledge and if I have all Faith so as to remove mountains but do not have love I am nothing and if I give all my possessions to feed the poor and if I Surrender my body to be burned but do not have love it profits me nothing and look at what he says he said I I don’t care about those spiritual gifts if you’re not even able to show love that’s the simplest thing is to show love to each other and that’s something that every one of us is called to do no matter what gifting you have you’re called to show love everyone isn’t called to preach everyone doesn’t have the gift of faith that as he says can can move mountains but we’re all called to pray all of us aren’t called to teach but we’re all called to share the gospel so everyone is important and no gift in and of itself is what makes you important because one it’s not of you it’s of God but two if you’re not doing it in love it means nothing so then he goes on and explains what what love is verse starting at verse four says love is patient love is kind love is not jealous love does not brag and is not arrogant does not act be unbecomingly it does not seek its own it’s not provoked does not take into account a wrongs suffered does not rejoice in righteousness but rejoices with the truth Bears all things believes all things hopes all things endures all things that’s love and you’ll notice in this there are well there are 15 characteristics that he points out about love in these four verses seven of them are positive meaning it’s what love is is patient kind rejoices with the truth Bears all things believes hopes and endures all things and there’s eight that are negative in what love isn’t or what love doesn’t do it’s not jealous it doesn’t brag it’s not arrogant does not act unbecomingly does not seek its own not provoked does not take into account a wrongs suffered and it does not rejoice in unrighteousness so we’re going to look through these and see what does it mean to be loving what does love look like because again this is the same love that if we don’t show it’s proof that we don’t belong to God we don’t know God and he doesn’t know us if we’re not living these things out so the first one love is patient and it literally means long tempered and we don’t use that phrase much in English long tempered but we say short tempered a lot we would say someone has a short temper so it’s the opposite of that and it’s almost exclusively used when referring to people not situations that doesn’t mean you can’t you shouldn’t Blow Your Horn at someone who’s uh when the light turns green and they’re still sitting there you’re not supposed to do that right you know let me tell you if you want to get beaten up by the word of God prepare a lesson or or or or preach on it man God just was showing me so much and just like all right so have you been loving have you been like come on this is about everybody else you know but man so in in very practical uh terms it’s talking about this the I the idea of of taking a long time to get angry it takes a lot as far as as what someone does and then has to be consistent and even then you it this is about self-control and and you’re able to Think Through how can I respond to this person in a loving way while this thing is happening that would cause anger or even um just impatience in Ecclesiastes 7: 8 and9 it says patience of spirit is better than Holiness of spirit do not be eager in your heart to be angry for anger resides in the bosom of Fools and and some of you will know that in the wisdom literature many times when the word fool is used is talking about someone who denies God someone who doesn’t know God not just someone who just makes a bad choice every now and then 1 Thessalonians 5:14-15 says we urge you Brethren at mesty unruly encourage the faint-hearted help the weak be patient with everyone see that no one repays another with evil for evil but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people patience should be the mark of a Believer and if you want to be loving you have to first be patient so you can’t be quick to get angry I mean even being slow to anger by the time you you’re getting to anger just picturing that being a path the word of God has time to work in your heart and you train yourself to not just respond in Anger proverb 1911 says a man’s discretion makes him slow to anger and it is his glory to overlook a transgression if we’re standing here in Christ then we have had countless sins transgressions forgiven and so we should we should find it almost a time of Joy when we get to show that same Grace when we get to overlook a transgression now I’m not here saying it’s easy especially when it happens more than once once and more than 10 times and or it happens with someone close to you and you’re like you should know better why do you keep doing this but it it should be a joy for us to be able to overlook a transgression the next one is love is kind and these two kind of go together so love shows kindness it love is inclined to perform good and to be useful to others that we’re purposely trying to be kind to someone this isn’t just I’ll just sit back and not respond but this is this is an active verb we are trying to show kindness to other people and patience and kindness uh someone said is uh the passive and active faces of Christian love it puts up with a lot but it also gives generously without thought of return and I think that’s a beautiful way to look at patience and kindness if we’re going to show love both of these things need to show up and and when we in would get angry and we instead replace that with with patience the next step is to seek to be kind to that person it’s not just I’m withholding my anger but now I’m seeking to show you kindness where anger would normally be displayed and that is how we show love to people and that is how we stand out in the world Jesus said they’ll know you’re my disciples by the love you have for one another and this is why it is a to use a term that gets overused it’s a radical kind of love that Christ calls us to and empowers us to do we also see that love is not jealous now the word used here for jealous it could be used in a positive sense and actually in 1 Corinthians 12:31 is used in a pos positive sense he tells them to earnestly desire uh the greater gifts and also in chapter 14 he uses this word in a positive sense a couple times um but it also can be used in a negative sense that’s it’s used here or used in uh acts 17 act 175 where it’s describing the Jews and they were jealous over the attention that uh Paul and um the people who were with him were getting excuse me so jealousy and envy here can take two main forms one is either wanting something that someone else has you see something that someone has you think it’s why they’re happy and you want that thing because you think it will make you happy whether it’s a material good whether it’s a a spouse a situation a job whatever it is a position that they have and you want that because you think it will make them happy you don’t necessarily want theirs and to remove it from them you just want the same or better now I mean that’s that’s bad enough but the other is even worse it’s when you want that person to no longer have the thing that you think makes them happy you don’t even care if you get it and one commentator gave the example of of when the two ladies came to Solomon and you know they had the the children and and one said well this you know my son died and other one said no no that was not that that was that was her son not my son and they’re arguing about that and the one who was lying she just wanted the other child the other to be childless as well she wanted the other mother to experience the same grief and if you don’t know the story don’t worry about it you’ll be okay not you know not remembering that but those of you who do that’s such a great example and he said okay I got the solution I’ll solve the child in half and you both take a piece and the one who already had the grief of losing their child say yeah sure that’s a great idea that way she can lose hers as well that just imagine the amount of wickedness that has to be in your heart to do that but I mean we we do that on a minor scale often when we just want someone to not have that that thing we want someone to not be happy with this and we wonder why do they get to be blessed in this way and it’s a similar thing and and again this is not a manifestation of love and so anytime it happens we need to be checking our heart even if we say I want them to be happy with that car but I want that car too I want a better car I want my dream house either one of these things dishonors God not being content with what God has provided for you you and especially when it shows up in this way in your dealings with other people and this is what Paul is talking about here this is not like an abstract love this is when you’re interacting with each other other these characteristics should be the main part of your interactions all of these should show up in some way now the Church of Corinth had such a problem with jealousy that uh Paul even brings it out directly and you don’t have to turn there but 1 Corinthians 3 uh verse three he says uh for since there is jealousy and strife among you are you not fleshly and are you not walking like Mere Men and what brought that out is he said I can’t even talk to you like your spiritual people I have to talk to you in the flesh I want to De feed you with meat but I couldn’t I had to feed you milk like a little baby cuz you weren’t ready you were still fleshly and carnal why because you’re jealous of each other now in our text the next one love does not brag now this is tied again to the previous one as many of them are this is kind of a a almost a Continuum um but many times boasting is a sinful reaction to becoming envious bragging to seem equal to the object of your Envy bragging to to inflate your importance in eyes of other people now again this is this is can take a shape in different forms uh self-righteous boasting can show up as excessive judgment or even legalism and the harsh judgment that we judge others with can imply that we’re better than them we don’t struggle with that sin and if you’re a Christian you wouldn’t deal with that either I can’t believe you even are are struggling with that sin and we we get puffed up with pride as if we’re better than someone and what’s worse is that we’ll do it to people who don’t even claim to be Christians and we’ll look at people who are in the world we’ll look at people on our job we’ll look at people in Congress we’ll look at people anywhere and say look at the way they’re sinning I can’t believe that what is this world coming to man this country has gone downhill we’ll make these these statements judging the people who are not Believers by the Christian standards that we fail to reach and it’s very similar to in Acts 15 where they were talking about whether they should still live by the um law of Moses and they got up and said wait we’re asking them to do something that neither we or our fathers could do now we’ve come to Christ Christ has taking care of it all and we’re going to put that yoke back on them no and it’s a similar thing not that God does not require justice but many times we look at others and their sin we’re so disgusted by it only because our disgust makes us feel better it makes us look better but we don’t look at our sins with the same level of content most of the time and so this bragging comes sometimes it’s about accomplishments sometimes it’s about where we are spiritually but this bragging can take many forms p 272 says let another praise you and not your own mouth a stranger and not your own lips now in I don’t know if everybody went has kind of grew up like this but in my culture we’re very big on nicknames so like if you look at if I went back to high school which you know back when what is love was out no one called me khif like I honestly think if you went to people I knew 30 35 years ago and just like oh you grew up with khif they like who but if you use my nickname which I’m not going to repeat here in the pull pit if you use my nickname they’d be like oh yeah yeah I know him but one of the rules always was you can’t give yourself a nickname come on it doesn’t count you can’t give yourself a nickname you know that’s one of the things if you guys know who Deion Sanders is Deion Sanders had about 10 nicknames of Shaquille O’Neal and every time you look they just come up with their own like nobody calls you that like Shaq you just want people to think you’re intell nobody actually looked at you and said That’s The Big Aristotle right there no one said that but Shaq one day just start calling himself The Big Aristotle you you can’t do that and this is what Proverbs is saying here let another praise you let another see these things about you don’t brag about him if you’re going to boast as Paul said you boast in the Lord and what he is doing and what he has done in your boasting you should seem small and God should seem great not the other way around love is not arrogant now I had to write down what I wanted to say about that cuz arrogance is one of those those sins see again when you don’t struggle with the sin as much you look at it like how could they do that but arrogance is one of those sins that just it’s can can I use the word is it okay to say annoying I don’t know I’m looking at Dr Ho you got to give me a can I say annoying arrogance is an an annoying sin especially to us who believe that God is Sovereign you haven’t done anything now yes we have to use the gifts God’s give us we have to make the most of the opportunity that he puts around us but just like this something can be taken from you including your mind so love doesn’t boast doesn’t brag love is not arrogant now I I’ve seen a translation of this that says love about love it say nor does it cherish inflated ideas of its own importance that is a great way to put it doesn’t cherish inflated ideas of its own import and it’s no surprise that we see this uh verb show up seven times in the New Testament uh being arrogant six of the times are in First Corinthians six most of the times this us is in 1 Corinthians and that was why they had so much disunity because they took pride in things that they hadn’t even done for themselves and they looked down on others who didn’t accomplish the things that they held as important now love also and we’re moving on to verse five all of that was in one verse verse five love does not act act unbecomingly so love doesn’t act in a way that’s rude or or contrary to good behaviors or good manners and while that’s not the same as having Pride or bragging or being unkind to someone it’s still mentioned here love doesn’t act in a way to to draw attention to Itself by these kind of rude behaviors or rude actions love doesn’t withhold proper behavior from someone because of their status or how likable they are or The Passion of the moment there are times and this is you know I’ve had to do this for myself where I’m talking to someone who maybe isn’t as use the right right right phrase I want to say likable but I don’t know lovable I don’t know just people who it’s harder to connect with I’ll say that what else that I’ll write that one down people who is harder to connect with and I’m talking to them and and I have to talk to myself and say okay no treat them with kindness to talk to them engage them fully as if it was person X who I get along with and love talking to and talk to for hours like and I have to say in my head pretend is that person so that I’m giving them my full attention I’m not being short with them them I’m not showing them that I’m not really very interested in this conversation or I wish you would just go or what you’re saying is kind of annoying me now because I don’t agree with your Viewpoint I have to say no you talk to them and you show them love and minister to them you listen to them because God might be trying to teach you something and and it’s not just always the other way around so all of the I have to like I’m saying all of this stuff constantly to myself while while I’m engaging with them especially if it’s a stranger cuz I don’t like strangers and a lot of I know that I don’t I I just don’t like like new people cuz I don’t like small talk and so all of these things well I’m the type of person who doesn’t like that I don’t like this none of that means that I get to not show love I’m not exempt from what God is saying here because I don’t like small talk so now I have an excuse I’m an introvert so now I have an excuse to not engage with this person and be loving with them and even just be kind and show them manners so while this isn’t on the level of some other sins it’s something that we can do often and we can really impact how people feel about themselves how welcome people feel especially in the body of Christ when they come here and we’re not showing them that same love that we would to others and it really can have an impact and with unbelievers many many Christians will blaspheme the name of Christ and lose opportunity to witness to unbelievers because we just can’t be kind to them we can’t can’t just show the manners we can’t refer to them without putting them in a category and attaching some type of label which we intend to use as a slur against them we just can’t engage with them as as as humans and then we lose the opportunity to represent Christ or we represent Christ and we blaspheme him and people say this is how all Christians are I would never listen to anyone who is like that you’re supposed to be loving so again love does not act unbecomingly and love does not seek its own it’s not selfish love seeks to be a blessing to others and isn’t preoccupied with the entrance the entrance of self now we contrast that with the constant talk today of self-love and we’re constantly told that we can’t properly love others until we love ourselves and you know you can’t pour from an empty vessels so you got to fill yourself up first and pour into others and all what so you know but but we all kind of go into I was talking to someone the other day and she’s a business owner and I said oh what made you start your business she’s like in her 25 26 something I don’t know she’s in her 20s and she said well you know it was really an act of self-love and I just all right never mind I just just forget it now I don’t know I’ll I’ll ask I’ll go on your website and I’ll read your story or something cuz I you know when she said that I was just like all right and I admit I just kind of shut down after that you told me it was an act of self- Lov to start your business I don’t even know what that means like I just meant like what at this young age what made you decide to leave your job and go and start a business but we got to hear about self self-love so it’s everywhere that we’re told that and when we hear that all I think about is the Bible saying in the last days men will be lovers of themselves and this is what we’re told to do you have to love yourself and usually loving yourself means you shut out everyone else that depends on you and you only focus on yourself even for a short time and I’m not going to engage with them I’m not going to give them the things that they need I’m not going to minister to anybody right now it’s different than the idea of just a vacation to refresh it’s really saying I’m so drained because these people just take it out of me all the time and I need to kind of get away from them and I need to have a a man cave and a Sheed and all these things that we need to do where I’m just here by myself and all the people who need me and the people that I’m charged with ministering to I just got to stay away from these people cuz it’s selflove and then I’ll be able to pour into them from a full vessel and isn’t it s sounds so good it sounds like wow I’m really trying to take care of them by going to the spa three times a week I’m oh I’m blessing you by doing that and then we come to Philippians 2: 3 and 4 it says do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit but with humility of Mind regard one another as more important than yourselves do not merely look out for your own personal interest but also for the interest of others and that’s what love looks like also love is not provoked so here actually we have a passive verb and this describes being the recipient of the mistreatment that and it’s one thing that it a little bo bothers me by this is it doesn’t say not easily provoked cuz then I can get provoked and say yeah but they asked for it they did a lot it they they just kept wearing me down and then I finally just snapped but that’s acceptable cuz I wasn’t easily provoked right there doesn’t say that love is not provoked and the the image here behind this word is is connected to the idea of being sharpened but in a sense that if you took like a block and you’re and you take like a plane or something and you’re just kind of scraping away at this block and shaping it to become a sharp object and you would just imagine your your your patience or your ability to love being that block and every time that person does that thing or you’re mistreated or you’re sinned against or you hear something you don’t like people just whittling away at your patience and at your love and then finally it just turns into this sharp object of of Destruction and you end up hurting people with it and so that’s that’s kind of the picture here that we get if we are to be loving we can’t be provoked to anger by irritating Behavior this isn’t always talking about big sins against us but it’s just those things that just constantly are just gnawing at us you know when I was I don’t hear about it much now when I was a kid and maybe it was in the James Bond thing I don’t know but it was we always hear about the concept of Chinese water torture you know where they would lay a prisoner down and strap their head down and you just have one drop just falling at one spot usually on their forehead or something and one drop of water doesn’t do any damage really but the 10 millionth drop it causes such excruciating pain that it’s worse than you just being like you know stuck through with something that’s that’s sharp and you know uh hot and so it’s just that’s the idea here is that someone does something and you say you know what that person that person is kind of a trigger for me because of the way that they speak or I don’t like this thing about them or they’re sinful person and sometimes you have to deal with that sin sometimes you have to be the recipient of it but other times we are able to engage with that person and point their sin out show them from the word of God and try to correct that behavior but people grow at different Paces people are Sanctified at different at different times just because you point out someone’s sin today doesn’t mean it stops but we’re still called to love them and especially in marriage now this isn’t some Veil attempt to to tell y’all I got a trouble marriage or anything like that you know things are going going great y’all see how good my baby look today too fine like some maywine in the summertime girl but when people are very close to us we’re typically less likely to overlook their offense because one we want to think they did it on purpose because they know us so well you know my what buttons to push and you love pushing them and that’s what we kind of accuse them of or you should love me so much that you should be going out of your way to avoid this behavior that annoys me or frustrates me and when you don’t when you do something when you sin against me it shows that you even love me you don’t even mean the things that you said and so many times it can be worse many times we’ll show more grace to those that we aren’t as close to than we do to the people who are closer to us but Paul here says no matter what love is is not provoked and love does not take into account a wrong suffered so he even heightens it that people can send direct directly against you it’s not just you witnessing something or just an irritating Behavior but you suffer a wrong or you’re sinned against and it’s not just here that says it Proverbs 10:2 says hatred stirs up Strife but love covers all transgressions love covers all transgressions 1 Peter 4:8 says above all keep fervent in your love for one another because love covers a multitude of sins and 1 Peter 4 passage is in the middle of a section talking about spiritual gifts and ministering within the church love covers a multitude of sins we should always be looking to show love and we’ll see a little later even when what what we should do when When sin comes up um to be loving but our goal is always to express love to the person and it could look different depending on the situation or our our relationship with the person but our goal should always be to express love love as it’s determined by God in the Bible that’s important as well because we all can rewrite these things and say well actually this is the loving thing and we can do that and I think we’ve become Masters at doing that so that we can still feel as though we’re being loving when we’re not and we can use our love as a license to do other things that we can say it’s well but I’m actually loving and here we see it’s simple it’s not easy but it is simple the idea of of being loving um some of you know that I work at Ruckers University I work specifically for the School of Management and labor relations and one of the HR professors says in her intro to HR class um she always tells the people 80% of good human resource management is followed just one rule don’t be a jerk and that’s it she just says look just don’t be a jerk and you got 80% just imagine if you were the worker how would you want to be treated how much time would you want to be given to known that you’re going to be laid off you know how would you want people to handle you and deal with you even if it’s a disciplinary issue coming up how would you like us to interact in that how would you like compensation to be determined all of those things just don’t be a jerk yeah there things you have to learn about the law that’s the other 20% the 80% is just be a kind person and as Christians that’s this what I feel this is this is a it’s a simple thing be loving but it’s not an easy thing because it goes against most of the things that are in our heart naturally and just everything Society is telling us especially for those two not being provoked to anger not being provoked or irritated and not taking into account a wrongs suffer and the beautiful thing about this is it’s it’s an accounting term so when it talks about taking into account it literally is talking about going to a ledger and marking that this transaction happened and this same word is used constantly to talk about our sin and the fact that it was no longer held against us and that we should be treating people the same way that God treats us and that positionally we stand before God as sinless in Christ and when we stand in front of each other that’s how we should be looking at them not saying well I remember back in 1997 when you said this thing to me or you did this or you didn’t want to give me a ride home and I’m just going to keep that in my head because I’m I’m going to know it’s going to be a time to come up and you’re going to need me and that’s that’s not loving and and we know that intuitively but we also feel like we’re justified in that in that behavior many times because we’re humans and and that’s just what we do but God is calling us as something different this is why he’s saying that this love will make you stand out in the world this is why you will appear to be different and love does not rejoice in unrighteousness so this could take many forms so one that I actually think this is the this is the least of what Paul is talking about here a a a corporate unrighteousness meaning I just don’t like sin in my family my community the the the the church my state my country that that’s not what he’s talking about here he’s talking about interpersonal relationships mostly now this this idea of of of not rejoicing in unrighteousness of course is in all forms we don’t rejoice in unrighteousness but he’s really is focusing in on our relationships with each other and many times we can be tempted to rejoice in someone’s failures or their sin either to justify our sinful response to them or to make us feel Superior to them and as I was looking at this and looking at the way that it’s used and I was saying that doesn’t really happen you know we don’t rejoice in sin we don’t rejoice in un righteousness but how many times do we think someone we either not trust them or we think maybe uh they’re not something’s a little off about them and then they sin and we’re like I knew it see I knew it and I have to confess to that because for whatever reason for the last 46 years of my life and I think so CU I probably didn’t want to be held by people that I didn’t trust so I think all 46 years of my life I probably felt like when I get around someone after 2 minutes I know if I can trust them I know if I’ll like them I know that if I’ll I’ll be friends with them and so many other things I remember meeting someone that was a a a pastor at my one of my old churches and meeting his his wife and saying like she’s not saved two minute conversation her like she not a Believer and later turned out that she wasn’t a Believer and part of it was the sin that she committed and while I wasn’t thrilled that a sin got committed I was a little happy to be Vindicated in my thoughts and saying like see I knew it I told y’all y’all didn’t want to listen to me when I was giving y’all that warning now look see y’ should listen to me now you know and and and so maybe not rejoicing but I definitely wasn’t displeased that the sin happened because it it displayed this thing and it made me feel better about myself CU I was able to say yep I was right I knew it see I I God spoke to me and told me that this thing about her and we can be tempted to do that with other Ministries especially now with every everybody has a podcast or a blog or everything and all these discernment Ministries coming up and all these things where people just love to take the sins of of pastors or the controversies happening in churches and broadcast it and dissect it and many times there you can see there is this kind of rejoicing in the fact that someone did something sinful you you’re glad that that came out glad that that that thing happened or it could be anything a politician that we don’t like up controversy yep see told you you couldn’t trust that person and we’re rejoicing in unrighteousness that doesn’t mean that we’re saying oh I wish this legislation would pass that promotes unrighteousness but we’re rejoicing in unrighteousness when it happens even in a in a church setting it seems though the Corinthians they probably saw themselves as a really tolerant church and that’s why in chapter 5 they didn’t want to get rid of that man whose sin was so horrific that he said it’s not even named among the Gentiles and they probably said no we’re a tolerant Church we’re going to keep him here and we’ll just be praying for them and this shows love and we’re actually being loving because we’re keeping him here and we’re not judging them and that instead of dealing with the sin like they were supposed to so he actually had to give them instruction to tell them get this man out of the church and said a little bit of leav will level the whole lump and out of this idea of false love you’re willing to destroy your church so no love does not rejoice in unrighteousness at every level but hating sin does not exempt us from showing love and cultivating the other 14 characteristics we don’t get to just pull this out and hang this one up and say I can ignore the other 14 even when someone is in sin and we’ll see that in a second love rejoices with the truth and this again is a direct contrast to the last point that he said does love does not rejoice in unrighteousness but rejoices with the truth and doesn’t simply uh seem to be pointing in this case to a universal truth or the gospel even though love does Rejoice obviously in the gospel and when people are getting saved but more so when it’s being lived out when when truth is being proclaimed and Truth is showing truth is showing up in your life truth is showing up in you conquering sin love causes us to Rejoice with those people rejoice in those situations when we see the truth being applied a commentator said Love Takes no Pleasure in someone else’s failure and delights in integrity and reality if the situation is bad love wants to help if the situation is good love wants to celebrate and that I believe is the best way to take these two of not rejoicing in righteousness and rejoicing with the truth is that we don’t Rejoice at all when we see sin at any level with any person but we do rejoice when God’s truth is being carried out when people are being delivered from sin when people are overcoming sin when people are standing up for righteousness that’s when we rejoice and now verse 7 he gives us these these four characteristics of love and for each one he says all things separately he repeats the word four times that it Bears all things believes all things hopes all things endures all things to really show this this emphasis that that love and I’m not quoting verse 8 here but love never fails so love bears all things and this one is actually I’m glad it came first because this actually pretty difficult not to know the precise use of the verb here because it can mean a lot of different things and it has kind of a variety of uses it’s one of those words that has a specific meaning or two and then that kind of morphed into a more kind of softer colloquial type of meaning um especially in in this type of Greek that’s used um but it primarily primarily means to cover or to protect and the verb form of this word um it’s actually translated as roof so it’s a protection or kind of a covering and it came to represent protecting someone or bearing up against something you know with with strong storms coming in and this thing this structure is standing up or enduring as a trait so as in the previous verse it would seem like the most natural meaning of this context is that of protecting or supporting in our relationships so love and possibly by covering sin but love protects the sinner from exposure and ridicule so I think this best to kind of do a little like a illustration someone sins you witness it you find out about it or they come to you and confess it to you to be loving to them one of your primary goals is to minimize their the exposure of their sin the ridicule that they would face the dishonor that they may face from that sin it’s not to go and broadcast it to people as a prayer request and and honestly this is this a lot of how how gossip goes and we find out somebody is sined in a certain way we are trying to serve them we are trying to protect them we are trying to support them you’re showing them love and whatever support is needed whether it’s correction or encouragement or wisdom we sit and share the scriptures with them we can try hey this book helped me through that we are praying with them hey can I text you every couple days and trying to hold hold them accountable whatever it is that they need at that time many times especially if no one else was involved in that sin that sin doesn’t need to go any further than you and them there are times of course the Bible talks about where someone either isn’t repentant or if someone is being has been sent sinned against then maybe now you bring in that person who was sinned against and you try to bring restitution and but but you’re giving that support and you are bearing all things your your your your your love never tires of supporting someone never tires of holding them up and your goal the whole time is to try to restore them now I’ll say one thing and this has I think been a an an issue with the I say the church kind of Universal at least in America um is that we’ll get that part right or kind of right where our focus is on the person who has sinned but when someone else is involved a lot of times we don’t spend as much time with the person who was sinned against and we don’t try to minister to that person as much and I think that’s definitely a failure and then when that person says oh I’ve repented of this sin now we go to the person who was sinned against and say okay I haven’t talked to you at all I don’t know where your emotions are I don’t know what you you’ve been dealing with I don’t know you’ve been going through but all right now it’s time to forgive them they said they said I’m sorry you got to forgive them and if not now we’re going to come down hard on you as The Sinner even now their sin doesn’t even matter now you’re the unforgiving unloving person and we have to do a better job of ministering that way and I believe the support that we provide in bearing all things there is wisdom in in the idea of seeing where that other person is if you sinned against one or others now I need to make sure they’re being minister to and they’re being made whole as well and so this becomes kind of a a kind of group thing you that doesn’t mean you have to do all this on your own but again in wisdom maybe you bring it to the elders maybe you bring it to someone else who’s close to the situation or someone who’s far from the situation or whatever it is but it’s just something that we need to there are countless websites that exist just to show that I was in the church and this thing happened and I got what most people are familiar with the term now Church hurt you know I went through that many times that church hurt is when someone sinned against me no one cared the The Sinner got coddled and no nothing happened to me but that’s not what this love does bearing all things providing that support then love believes all things again this this is another one that’s that’s tough for me because of that tendency that I have that I talked about of saying okay I’ve gotten 18 bits of information about you I know you I know I know I know what you’re tempted to do I know the harm you’re going to bring I know you know all these things I know if I want to engage with you or not but love believes all things so this doesn’t require us to ignore the truth about a person or situation so it doesn’t mean that every time you walk into a room a person punches you in the throat and you’re like okay I’m going to keep walking into that room and I believe they’re not going to do it this time that’s that’s not what uh we’re calling for here um it’s not that a Christian and even uh John Calvin pointed this out strips himself of wisdom and discernment but it believes that no one is beyond salvation or sanctification it believes that there is no one so bad so evil so wicked so jaded so old so whatever that they cannot change because God does the work right it’s God’s power so when you say that person stuck in their ways what are you saying about God especially when you’re talking about a Believer love believes all things and it also assumes the best motives when it’s impossible to know the motives that’s that’s another tough one cuz we all the time like nope this this the reason why they did this was for this this this reason I know that and I was talking to someone recently I honestly can’t remember who it was I don’t think it was anyone at Calvary if it was one of y’all forgive me um but they were talking about reaching out to people and I remember who it was now no none of you um but they were talking about reaching out to family members and they said something like oh I called them and they said they were busy and they had to call me back and they didn’t call me back so obviously they don’t want to talk to me so forget it so I’m not reaching out to them anymore I there are times that I go to buy something and use my like online and put my wallet by my desk and then I go out in the morning and almost forget my wallet because it’s not where I usually have it at I definitely will forget to text someone back or call someone that doesn’t mean all of these evil thing but we assume that but love doesn’t we assume the best motives when it’s impossible to know the motives and know the heart and it’s closely connected to the next one love hopes all things so love continues to hold out hope when interacting with others especially because we know of God’s power so love believes all things and hopes all things and then because of that love endures all things and this is actually a military term that ref refers to holding a position even while under enemy attack we’re not letting go of this spot it’s too strategic and we are going to stand here and we are going to endure love endures all things love never gives up that is what it means to be a believer and to be loving and why our love is so radical that when people see it witness it when they experience it they say that has to be someone who knows Jesus that is what makes people respond in that way and so the next time we’re wondering what would the loving thing be in this situation how can I love this person Paul gave us 15 points right here that we can pass our possible decision through and we can say okay does it fulfill these 15 things if so then yes I’m being loving and then we cultivate those things daily and we’re praying for them and praying about them so I just want to leave you with that there is a lot here of course it’s possible that we’ll be going over some of this in some form um in yam next year I don’t know yet but um of course if you have any questions come to me if you miss any Scripture but I definitely want to just leave you with that challenge that all of us can be better in this area and many of us have misnamed other attributes and said this is what love is and it isn’t and so we need to be challenged in that and we need to be encouraged to keep doing the loving things amen Let’s uh bow in a word of prayer our gracious God we want to thank you for being the model of love we want to thank you for loving us when we didn’t even know what love was we thank you God for empowering us to love you and to love others and we pray God that you would every day give us the strength to put off sin to continually put on righteousness and to be able to minister to each other in true love and wherever we fall short I pray God that we will be seeking to get right with you we will be seeking your good seeking your glory and be doing everything to make you look great in the eyes of all and ask this in Christ’s name amen